It is said '' the future belongs to the children '' and this is a truth but not an accurate truth I do not believe. The future belongs to us all, young old and in between.
I am the Elder of my family, a position one must earn across the history of it, not something you can claim by age or secure by being a demanding person that people fear to deal with but are imprisoned by blood and a sense of debt owed.
My children owe me nothing for raising them, nothing for being their Father, it was Love that led me through those days, love that said I will have my life when they are grown and gone to their own. It is love that said I would love them to be there everyday of my life. I do not love my family, I am in love with my family, leading them to their own freedom of me and the feeling I am at some level an obligation of old age.

I have not been here in a long long time writing, but - I am back. Having been lost in myself and lost in the troubles that often accompany a large family in a society more lost than I ever could be. I am here to announce that whatever detered me has been healed and what could not has been removed. I have only one out of control demon to slay and that is a part of this new determination and renewal of myself.
I am a spiritual Master of more than one craft, having dedicated my life to it since my youth and the topography of my life would not bear that out by a common look at it.
Troubles, trials, desperation and torment - and in the midst of the journey, my family came to rescue me and set me a course that has brought me to this moment and strength, power, and steeled determination.
I have been married twice and found it to be a land with borders and too small for roaming as far as my mind can see. I also do not believe in love as stated in this culture we claim as civilized. Love is like meditation, your either in that state all the time or your not. What we call love in this culture is an exchange, service for service, and does not survive past the need for the service.
My love of family does not die, it grows even beyond my own death, even beyond the death of the Universe. It is science, spirituality, and the impossible realized into life and fed by an eternal supply of life.
I am back from the dead.